This is such a long journey of a 30 year marriage. I don’t quite know where to begin. I am 55 years old, my husband is 74 years old. This is my first marriage, I have no children. My husband’s 2nd marriage he has a daughter who is 50 years old. You can well imagine my journey with her has been very very difficult, with lots of compromising on my part to keep my marriage peaceful. I am born again, my husband is a believer, my step daughter is born again and is a Christian councilor, applying and teaching Arthur Burke’s Deliverance on the the Brain Methodology. As she is his only child she grew up very spoiled, so I have sacrificed a lot to accommodate her every whim. She currently been separated from her husband for the last 6 six years, who has been struggling for 10 years to divorce her. She has 3 children – boy 21, 2 girls 19 and 17 respectfully. She has been a stay at home mum her whole life, even though my husband paid for her 4 year university degree she has never worked. We have been supporting her financially my whole married life. We have given up all our life savings to keep her happy. None of her children want to live with her as she is controlling and very manipulative. My husband and I paid to put her son through university, he lived with us for free for 3 years. There is huge money we have lost due to bad business decisions her husband made. We are currently paying for her rent R13000 per month for a mansion in a very fancy area, she will not lower her standards or compromise on anything. She has an attitude of entitlement. She took offence to advise my husband gave her in January 2021 about her divorce case, when he went with her to course to support her, and she hasn’t spoken to either of us since. There is so much wrong with this situation it is mind blowing for me to even try and comprehend a Christian who has total disregard for her parents, thinks is okay to manipulate people, force her children to sue her their grand parents for future maintenance in order for her to keep up her life style and walk around with the bible under her arm, telling everyone how unholy we all are, yet she is the one who has destroyed 2 families and bankrupt all of us. Yet, my husband continues to keep her happy by throwing money every time she switches on her tears, stating she is a victim in all of this.
My pray is for justice to be done is this situation, for my husband to open his eyes to the destruction she is causing. For God to heal my deeply broken heart, I have lost all respect for my husband, I no longer for fill a wifely position in this marriage, I am just a servant and a care giver. I have sacrificed everything for him, I have given up an inheritance from my Aunt to pay off his daughters debt, I lost my beautiful home, I gave up my job when my husband retired, I lost my business because of a selfish business decision my husband made, we sold our holiday home which we didn’t owe a penny on, which I used my 24 year banking career pension money to buy, my husband gave the money away to his daughter and son in law to invest in 3 business that amounted to nothing. They bought themselves a game farm instead and lost all of it. The list goes on and on and on. I can’t do this anymore. She has absolutely no respect for me, yet I keep forgiving and giving to her and her kids. Where is God in all this, I have wept, night and day for the last 10 years, I have prayed and fasted. You are probably going to tell me I need to forgive them, I will tell you, you are absolutely right. I have been on Christian women’s camps, seen councilors, psychologist because I think there is something wrong with me, and yet I can’t get free on any level with breakthrough in this situation. I am desperate for answered prayer. This journey is really lonely in an unequally joked marriage. I have no friends because my husband is so jealous, I gave them all up, because he wants me around him 24/7/365. I live in South Africa, born in Scotland, UK. My husband is South African, my sisters and mother, nieces have all left South Africa in the last 5 years for a better life in the UK, even though I love and miss them all dearly none of them are born again. My faith is starting to waiver, I am struggle to see God’s grace and mercy and justice in my life. I don’t know what to pray anymore. I am tired, and hopeless.